It was Saturday, and a busy night was expected at the Oyster Bar & Spaghetti Machine and it was also Bobby L’s birthday. Earlier in the day I picked up a gift that we would give to him over drinks after closing.

This was when Ann Arbor wasn’t too precious to have a downtown pornshop. The gift was blow-up love doll. Not wanting to waste time at the end of the night, the doll was inflated and stashed in the owner’s (we’ll call him Greg) upstairs office.

The restaurant was filling up, even a little two-top that was next to last to be used. Right next to it was another two-top that was always the last table seated.  Around this time Greg arrived upstairs and found the love doll.

Thrilled as could be, he rushed downstairs to the dining room to show off his find (despite an almost full house). He announced her as his date and seated himself and her at the one empty table. Folks were shocked, some amused, but the couple at the adjacent table were aghast.

Their discomfort would grow worse. Apparently Greg had punctured the doll, she began to deflate, slowly sliding to the floor, her dead eyes and round “O” shaped mouth turned towards the poor couple.

Greg seemed incredulous that they left in a huff (and didn’t pay). Bobby L didn’t mind, ‘though I think we had to spring for a repair kit.

Shared By: Floyd, The Evil Waiter, Mason, MI